The last few days have been just crazy.
Universally from what I hear.
My heart strings are being pulled in a thousand different directions trying to do what I can for my friends and my family that are in need of support.
I have two different sets of friends who lost loved ones the same day. Both really hard loses - not that any loss isn't hard because they all are. I'm just witnessing it first hand. I'm walking around trying to figure out how to best support them as they are both families that are so dear to us.
It's also been a hard work week. Almost every machine at work has had a problem of some form or another with 3 of them quitting all together. And oh, the chaos that causes... I've been so distracted I haven't been able to give it a lot of attention, but I am aware that it's there and that it is my job to make sure it all gets fixed and paid for.
Then, this morning my dad was in an accident. He's just fine, but his truck is not - he thinks it will probably be totaled, but they haven't heard one way or another. It wasn't a bad accident, just a fender bender. Thankfully, he wasn't hurt and it wasn't his fault. His truck is replaceable. He is not.
So, there's a lot on my mind today.
I was thinking to myself driving the kids to their destinations today..."come on... can I get a breath? Please?"
My heart is just so heavy for the world. Not just my dearest friends who are hurting and my family, but for all that is going on everywhere. I've been spending a lot of time praying for all the people in the world who are struggling with whatever they are struggling with that it will somehow become easier for them. In my heart, the world is a heavy place right now.
This is where I am at.
Once we reached the last stop before work, I had this moment of sunshine.
I was dropping Kalib off at his friend Braxton and my friend, Tommy Ty's home. Tommy is a mentor in the Wild Intelligence Program Kalib participated in.
I had not planned on staying and talking with Tommy today. I was running late for work and I had planned to run past the quilt shop on the way home to get the backing fabric for Yab Yum.
Instead, I spent an hour talking with Tommy about things that inspire me and things that inspire him to BE who he is and WHY he has the dreams he does. And WHAT we want out of our lives. It was a wonderful hour well spent and I didn't have to work too late to catch up.
I needed a reminder of why we live the way we live. And why we chose the things we chose to have value in our lives. Why when my friends are hurting I want to be there for them. I mean I could leave them on their own and turn away to get on with my life, but to see them suffering or to know they are so sad makes me sad because that is how I love. Through the good and the bad.
If you were a fly on the wall you may think the conversation was the same old stuff everyone talks about. Bills, Money, Gas, Weather, Travel, Sickness, Allergies... but for me it was this glimmer of hope that tells me that even though life is a struggle people are truly wonderful to know and love. I am lucky to know so many people that I love and because I love them I also hurt with them. They would do the same for me because together we have built a community.
So tonight, as I write this I'm still hurting for my friends and they are constantly in my thoughts, I'm still praying for the world, but I am also fully aware of how lucky I am to be in such a community full of love. A community that is changing us, those whom it touches, and the world.
This is the greatest gift we have to give.